Wednesday, August 15, 2012

no title ..

I have a thousand thoughts floating around in my head.  It just doesn't seem like I can get them all organized.  Sometimes when I have a minute to actually think, I come up with all these great posts I am going to write.  I think I will do it just as soon as I get home, or finish homework, or finish dishes.  I just never stop and put my thoughts in writing any more.  I am busier than I was back when I started my blog.  I have two grand babies who are here most every day.  Really four, but the two that are 6 and 11, I hardly know they are here.  Kadie, who is 18 months has me totally wrapped around her little finger.  Totally.  And Kyson, well he's a mess all on his own.  So I want to post more often, I just don't or can't.  So I guess I'll just play catch up and hit the highlights of my Crazy, wild life.

One reason I have been busy, is we have added to our family.  I thought I would do this wonderful post, but that was 3 months ago and I still haven't posted about them so now I'll just have to say we adopted again.  It has been a surprisingly easy time.  I'm still holding my breath though.  We all know about the honey moon period.  SO far so good.  I have definitely fallen in love.  That part was easy.  Having them return that love.....maybe.  Older children are always harder than babies.  In my experience the older the harder, although some older kids really try to fit in, and some have been bounced around so much they could care less. They think you are just another stop. And of course mental illness plays a factor.  Over all I'm very pleased.  I guess I just expected the worst and got the best.  It's hard to form your own opinion when you have all this paperwork and social workers giving you all the negative information.  The children's ages are 12, 10, and 9.  Beautiful, beautiful kids.  Fits right in with all my other beautiful children.  Will these be the last?  Maybe, Maybe not.  I have ask the Lord to quench my desire to keep raising children.  I'm getting older and ALL my grown children won't let me forget it.  I so love to be a mama.  I have the ability to love.  Not to expect love in return so much , but just to love them.  So, I have started dreaming of what I'll do in 10 years when they are all grown,all but the baby, who's 2.  Just dreaming. Right now I have 5 in dance, 2 in soccer, 2 in cheer leading, 1 in cross country, 1 in football, and a special needs tumbling group which starts soon. So, I don't have much time for dreaming.  But being Mama, keeps me smiling as well as busy:)