TEENAGERS!

Today was really a nice day. My title doesn't really mean UGH, just OH my goodness, where has time gone. These pictures are of Krishawnda and Nick and of Marvin and Caitlyn. They hung out here today after church and were very well behaved. I really want so much for my kids. I want them to know they are loved. I want them to know they are valuable, not only to me but to others as well. I want them to succeed in life. I want them to sell out to Jesus. Oh I just could go on and on. I truly think they are on the right path. I know that life will throw some curve balls and I expect it and I'm ready for it, but today was a good day. Teenagers acting like Christian teenagers. They played video games and watched movies and ate. I enjoyed being with them.

Speaking of eating, the church had a teenage girls conference yesterday and served Mexican food from a local restaurant. All that was left they sent home with us. It was so wonderful. The food was great and all I (and the girls ) had to do was heat it up. Thanks so much New Community. We will sure be stopping in at the Mexican dinner and letting them know how much we enjoyed everything!

One good day can make up for a whole bad week!

The way I would Like it

My time isn't always spent like I would like for it to be. I envision my large family going different some days. Most days. I got up as usual Friday morning, got the kids off to school and decide I would work on paperwork that was due a long time ago for a followup procedure at a FAS Clinic. As I began to fill in lines I realized I had filled out the same paperwork last time and HELLO nothing had changed. But being the mom who tries to follow all the rules I again filled out the same 20 sheets of paperwork. Birthdate? Do they really think that could change? Weight at birth? Same. Length at birth? Same. When did he sit up? talk? potty train? All the same as 1 year ago. Still I went on. My phone rings. My sister in law, who is trying to handle her dads (Keith's dad) estate. I give advice and realize I'm going to be late for a school meeting if I don't go so I hurriedly finish my conversion, and lay aside said paperwork for later. I rush through a shower, and leave instructions for Keith as he was watching a little one for me. Surprisingly I wasn't more than 2 minutes late. The teacher however was in the middle of something she couldn't let go so I waited a while on that. The meeting went well. Except now I was running late for my next IEP meeting at another school. I rushed and made it. Although the front sign in machine did delay me a little. (I hate it) That meeting went OK. I'm still undecided as to what to do. Placement for a child with FAS, MID and ADHD isn't easy. Then I stopped in at the front office to sign out and decided I'd ask about an annual. You see this is the same school I attended. It was first through twelfth grade then. I know, a long time ago. You would think the school would have a copy of every yearbook from the beginning. Well they don't. But I did borrow my 11th grade year. I was on my way home with a vision of sitting with a cup of coffee enjoying reminiscing. Except after I had been home 15 minutes, just long enough to make the coffee the FAS clinic calls and NEEDS me to fax the paperwork to them. SO I jump on finishing up the paperwork, I try to fax it. . Fax doesn't work. Well I call back and ask just to reschedule an appointment so I can mail in the paperwork, and the receptionist just about has a cow. NO, you confirmed the appointment with a promise to get that paperwork to us. OK, let me see what I can do. I can fax something at a local business, but it cost $1 a page, and as it was 36 pages all together counting a copy of his IEP and some other test the school had administered. I call the school and they graciously say they will fax it for me. Thank goodness. So I rush back to the school and they finally get it to fax. By this time my coffee is long forgotten. It's past lunch time and as Keith was off we had planned a light lunch out. So I run home ask if he has already eaten. No, he waited on me. So off we go, to a sit down quiet lunch. Well after 5 minutes sitting at the table my phone rings. It was the pre school. Nothing big, but it took time. Then Keith's phone, again nothing big but time consuming. Then they bring our food. So we squeeze in conversation around mouth fulls, because we have to be home at 2:45 because the bus will be there. We make it home with 5 minutes to spare. Then 8 kids come in. My time is consumed with signing agendas and listening to how their day went. They were all excited about Monday starting Dr. Seuss week. After serving snack and getting everyone ready to play outside it was time to begin dinner. Life was full force after that with all the usual stuff until bedtime. This is not exactly how I wanted my day to go. Maybe I'll get around to the yearbook and coffee today. I doubt it. But Oh well.

ballet

My two youngest girls are taking a ballet/tap class. They have been at it for about a month now and they love it. I don't think they love the class as much as they love the outfits. Hannah my 10 year old is going to begin a dance class this coming week. It is a jazz/hip-hop class. I hope she likes it well enough to continue, as I think this will be good for her. The youngest boys are signed up to play soccer. It will be a comical game with Austin playing. DJ, Krishawanda, Marvin, Anthony, and Destinee are running track for the High school. Kieanna and John are running track for the middle school. Robert, Kieanna, John, Selena are in Middle school band, with Marvin and Anthony in High School band. Doreese is in HS chorus with Cora in middle school chorus. Cheer season just ended for Desinee. And basketball season just ended with Krishawanda and Kieanna. Wrestling season just finished up with Daivon winning in his region to go to state. DJ, Marvin and Anthony also wrestled and did well. Promise has a talent show tonight at school. She is singing Carrie Underwood's "Jesus take the Wheel. I think she actually sounds really cute. I think that has everybody doing something. WHEW! It all keeps me and them busy. It is a good tool to use when it comes to behavior. Everyone wants to do something and they know that in order for them to participate they have to have good behavior and do well in school. So it works really well for the younger ones and fairly well for the older ones.

Remember my 17 year old, who is failing some classes. Well we came to an agreement. In order for him to run track, (which he is awesome at!) he has to give me an hour everyday at the kitchen table studying. So far So good. He came in and said" hey mom guess what, I made a 100 on my Spanish test." My reply: Oh, Everyone we have a new idea, study and you get good grades!!! Everyone cracked up. The young man laughs and turns red. Hopefully this will get across the importance of studying.

I keep chugging along, starting to look forward to an empty nest. Did I just say that? Well when you have 10 teenagers you have to have something to look forward to.

Wanting to Blog

I really do want to blog. I haven't forgotten. I have just been going through an awful invasion of privacy and haven't had the heart. I've never come across someone who doesn't just want to be part of your life, but to actually step into your life without your permission and cause commotion. I wanted to say trouble, but decided I wouldn't. God is in control after all. So much is happening. Good and troubling. I know we have to keep on keeping on. Some days that's easier than others. I'm making my blog private for a while. Maybe things will get back to normal. I'll be blogging more. For sure. Keep us in your prayers.

Getaway

Keith and I had a fantastic weekend. We try and go away once a year and spend some time together. It means so much just to sit and talk and spend time together. I'm already looking forward to next year! LOL A great friend looked after the four teenage boys for us while we were gone. I so appreciate it. It was a worry off of me to know the boys would be entertained and would not act up. They are always good away from home. Tabitha and Staisha had the rest and said they were all really well behaved also. Small miracles happen. School was cancelled Friday and all the kids were home. Tabitha hadn't counted on that and when I talked to her at 6:00 that morning I could hear panic in her voice. All the kids had fun playing in the snow. We got delayed with the snow, but still enjoyed getting away for a little while. You look at things different after being out of the main stream and being able to breath without constant redirecting, cooking, cleaning, and the ten million other things that goes on around here. Unfortunately as soon as we got back BAM! stuff happens. Oh well. Such is the life.

Grades !!!!!

I am so struggling with parenting my teenage sons. If they were 6 years old I would spank their behinds, ground them from cartoons, or make them sit in time out. I can't do ANY of that with my teens. Two of my teenage boys are failing. BAD. Not by a few points but my 20 and 30 points. I have grounded them. Their attitude: Mom I'm gonna bring it up. My teacher hasn't put in my grades. Its not my fault. Everyone is failing that class. I am so SICK of it. I guess they think I want them to make good grades for me. I can not get it through to them that if they fail high school classes they will never make it at college. Let alone get scholarships to pay for college. There is not enough support from the school system. Why would they let these boys play sports? I mean even if they break track records and win at state in wrestling what is that doing for their life? They can not make a living at wrestling or track or basketball. They are not THAT good. So what should i do? One boy does seem to get it. He is just so la de da. Oh I'll get it up. The other could care less. When told he was grounded and couldn't go anywhere he went ballistic. He knocked things over, cussed and said he was going to fail everything. So how can I get it through to him. If I let him suffer natural consequences like failing a class, what is that teaching the other kids. Just let it go. I Can't. I just can't parent like that. I am trying to parent and teach responsibility. What can we expect out kids to do in this world if they don't show some kind of understanding that the world doesn't bow down to them. No one in this real life will make exceptions for them. If you have any ideas I'm open to them. Therapy is already involved. Mentors are already involved. I tried to get teachers involved, they made promises that they did not follow through with. They did a little so they could stay in the sport and then just let it go. What can I do to make them understand? Thanks for letting me vent.

slowly slowly slipping away

Seven of my children are in HIGH SCHOOL. Sometimes I forget they are growing up. I still see them as children who need me. BUT they don't! They see themselves as grown. I see them as little kids. I guess we are both gonna have to change our prospective. They stay so busy. It makes me happy to know they lead full lives, but also sad because they aren't spending time with me. 5 of the 7 were sitting on the foot of my bed tonight just hanging out and talking. That's good right? I see so many videos, magazines and advertisements where the kids have on earphones and the mom is talking on the phone or watching TV and they are not communicating. I love talking to my teens. Sometimes I have to bite my tongue about my real opinion, but mostly I try and be honest with tact. I have a good relationship with all of them, and hope I continue to do so. I am so proud of them all. 18 is not old enough to be making decisions without me! LOL