Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The Rest of the Story

The first child we adopted was a little boy I had been keeping since birth. I loved him from the moment he was born. His mom was my step-sister. She was a lot younger than me, and her dad and my mom divorced, so she didn't spend much time with us. He was 3 when DFCS took him into custody. By the time they got around to termination 3 years had passed, so he was 6 when the actual adoption took place. He is 16 now.

The second adoption was a sib group of 3. The day they called and ask me to take the kids I didn't even ask Keith. I just said yes. They too were loved instantly. He came home to a 4 year old a 2 year old and a nine month old. The parents were from EL-Salvador, the kids were born here. They went back to their birth father once but he wasn't able to care for them so we got them back. He stays in contact and for the most part has been a good connection for the kids. I'm told the mother went back to El Salvador. The children are now 17, 15, and 13. Boy does time fly.

So we are still fostering, and have 5 adopted and 2 birth still at home. A distnant relative showed up one day and announced that DFCS had her children and were going to terminate her rights. She ask if we would take the kids? I have to say I was really torn. This mom loved (still loves) her kids. She didn't have any resources or the IQ to take on raising three (1 special needs) boys. We decided it was the best thing for the boys. They fit right in and were loved as if they had been here all along. We were family after all and they could maintain some contact with her. They were 3, 5, and 7. They are now 10 (almost 11), 13, and 15.

At this time DFCS said OK you can't foster any more! It broke my heart. I would still be fostering if we could. I felt so strong about adoption. I really prayed a lot about this. I was told of an adoption agency that worked with famlies to adopt only. So I checked them out and really loved them. After I contacted them, and we had our homestudy done, DFCS did call me and say Oh yea, you can still adopt , just not foster. Well I had been shown the door. We were already approved through our new agency so we stayed with them.

It didn't take long , and we were matched with a sib group of 5. Yes, 5. This group has been my hardest by far. I'm sure I will have lots of post about them. They are also some of my most smartest kids. SOme of them sure have college potential. They are african-american-white. I can't spell caucation? Their ages at the time of placement were 5, 7, 8, 10,and 11. 4 girls and one boy. Because they were not placed with me in foster care to began with , they suffered lots of moves and seperation. They had also been abused. All of the other children had been taken for neglect. This has made a great difference in the way they react to life. They are 11, 12(almost 13) 14, 15, and 16. They are doing GREAT! Oh we still have our ups and downs , but they have come so far. I truly love them.

Ok now we have 12 adopted and 4 by birth. But my hearts desire wasn't filled yet! .....

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